He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away. ~Dinah Craik
I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. ~Lucille Ball
Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever. ~Author Unknown
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