When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it. ~Author Unknown
I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience. ~Author Unknown
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. ~Larry Lorenzoni
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
A father carries pictures where his money used to be. ~Author Unknown
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