When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
In childhood, we yearn to be grown-ups. In old age, we yearn to be kids. It just seems that all would be wonderful if we didn't have to celebrate our birthdays in chronological order. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. ~Larry Lorenzoni
Youth is a disease from which we all recover. ~Dorothy Fulheim
Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
No comments:
Post a Comment