Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. ~Lucille Ball
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash
Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. ~Don Marquis
One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. ~Jennifer Yane
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march. ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
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