A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. ~Larry Lorenzoni
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
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